Emotions are one of the most fundamental characteristic of us. We get angry, fall in love, hate that b*tch for what she'd done and gets stirred up on the deaths of innocent lives. Emotions.
I should say I grew up as quite an emotional person. Happy, Excited, Jealous, Angry and all the like-so. Even now I still try my best to gain control of my composure. I especially get extremely disturb by suicides and murders. Being an emotional person, I've been through a lot of storms. Maybe being emotional makes small stuffs large. There were many times I got into fights with my own family. I get angry easily - like really, really easy. Thanks to my outbursts, I'm not so proud to say I nearly punched my own mother, choke till he's near to death my own brother and honestly wanted to kill my own father. That's me. When people see me, they tend to see a happy fair face. I'm not like what I was before, but I'm not close to perfectness still. Regardless, I know who I am and therefore, I do not judge anyone in this world. I know that I have a bad heart and foolishness. I know my own limits. But I tried hard, harder than yesterdays. I tried my best to control my anger, my frustrations and my burst of joys too. I learn that they come and go - but that rate of change depends on the present 'me'. Life is what I made of it. Certain choices of the past affected my present. Things that I entirely didn't anticipate at all. Nevertheless, I gotta try to do my best today. I really have to. I've come this far, I just can't go back. There's no place for me anymore in the back. All that I know is in front of me. All the experiences, knowledge, memories that are to come. I have no doubt that regardless of what's been done, my present perseverance, faith and hope would carry me forward. I'll keep running and I'll keep pushing the boundaries of my walls. Today I ran for a mile. Tomorrow I take a further steps forward. And with that thought everyday for the rest of what's given to me, I'll reach a place where the land ends and cloud covers the landscape. Then I'll look up and say, "I'm here. I did my best and done my worst. But I'm here. I am. Now it's time to quietly sleep". And sleep I will, quietly, slowly and soundly.